Call 1800-LOVE-PEH

A man spoke frantically into the phone: "My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart!" "Is this her first child?" the doctor asked. "No, you idiot!" the man shouted. "This is her husband!"

Are you bored? Do you simply have so many fun things to do that you do not know where to start? Are you starting to MISS mugging? Fret not. Research has shown that while many people say they desire freedom, they are actually afraid of the uncertainty that comes along with it. That is, they fear the insecurities that a lack of routine will bring to them. "We are free from the A levels!" - simply translates to "oh no now i have 18hours a day to spend without any mugging to do!"

If you actually read this far, well, sad to say, you must be part of the above crowd. I am going to give you a very simple solution to that. Now don't get me wrong, most things in life don't have quick fixes. But this is one exceptional case. Pick up your handphone, go to your contacts, scroll down the list.... A..B..C..D..E..F..G..H..I..J..K..L..M..N..O..P..Q..R

OK STOP THERE. Don't go further down to S. Stop at R.

Call RANDY and ask him out. Get him away from WOWbeta, or the likes of it. Now being the helpful coauthor of this blog, I will give you some hints and tips to ensure that he will say YES to your date proposal.

1. If you are a girl, say that "I'm so bored that I feel like crying. Pleez go out with me"
2. If you are a boy, say "Eh, very long nv play pool liao. lets go shoot some balls"
3. If you are none of the above, PLEEZ, don't let him know until he is out with you.
4. Well, if you are simply such an introvert that you have never asked Randy for his number, leave a tag and I will get back to you shortly. And as you can see, given my height, the shortly is rather short. :) <--- omg smiley
5. Act FAST. While stocks last! <-- wow i rhyme.





Now ok, you have to understand that we are all busy people. So don't take it too personally when Randy rejects you, whether he did it in a subtle manner or not. But trust me, it most probably is personal. Don't go kill yourself alright, that might make the whole world happy but we don't want you to be TOO sad. Here, courtesy of dumbthings.com:

Next time you think you're having a bad day read this:

A psychology student in New York rented out her spare room to a carpenter in order to nag him constantly and study his reactions. After weeks of needling, he snapped and beat her repeatedly with an ax leaving her mentally retarded.

Iraqi terrorist, Khay Rahnajet, didn't pay enough postage on a letter bomb. It came back with "return to sender" stamped on it. Forgetting it was the bomb, he opened it and was blown to bits.

Born loser? Blame your parents. Researchers in Wales now say that your bad luck may be more than, well, bad luck. Professor Peter McGuffin says you may be genetically programmed to lose. "Adverse life events," says the professor, "happen more frequently" to genetically unlucky people.

Tech Support: "What does the screen say now.." Person: "It says, 'Hit ENTER when ready'." Tech Support: "Well?" Person: "How do I know when it's ready?"

OK. That's enough stupidity to last for the few days that I'm out having fun. Bye!